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Removing Stress From Your Money And Life With Val Petit – Ep. 73
Finances is one of the leading causes of stress across the board.
Often we approach it from the financial side with practical money management, mindset and your emotions around money
Today let’s look at the stress side. How can you reduce your stress? Because when you remove stress you’ll be able to relax and finally see things a little clearer!
LISTEN OR SUBSCRIBE FOR FREE IN YOUR FAVORITE PODCAST APP:
Apple Podcasts | Spotify | Google Podcasts | RSS
Resources:
Money Mindset Mastery Checklist: https://aimeecerka.com/mindset
Connect With Valerie
Instagram: @coachvalmn
Facebook Group: “Kick Stress To The Curb” https://www.facebook.com/groups/1401092377357355
Connect With Aimee
Instagram: @aimeecerka
Work With Aimee: https://workwithaimee.com
Podcast Key Points
2:05 – Having Enough Money For Summer Camp
4:05 – Lottery Tickets for Christmas
5:35 – Micro Managing Boss
9:15 – Money & Stress
12:15 – Sponsorship – Money Mindset Mastery Checklist
13:31- Stress Without Symptoms
14:35 – Money Visualization
21:21 – Free Gift Transformation Kickstart Journal & Connect With Val
Frustrated that you aren’t making the progress that you should within your finances? Create an unshakable money mindset with the Money Mindset Mastery Checklist
Managing Stress and Finances: A Simple Guide for a Happier Life
Finances is one of the leading causes of stress across the board. Often, we approach this from the financial side with practical money management mindset and handling your emotions around money. Today, let’s take a look at the stress side. How can you reduce your stress? because when you remove stress, you’ll be able to relax and finally see things a little clearer.
Introducing Valerie Petit
Today, I’m joined by Valerie Petit, she is a Certified Life and Health Coach focusing on stress management, she left her 25-year career in the corporate world because of burnout. Through her coaching programs. Her clients learn to prioritize themselves by digging into areas they want to improve, but do not allow themselves to think about clients come to reduce their stress and leave with bigger changes and dreams. So, let’s do this!
Welcome to the Your Money Your Life podcast. I’m your host Aimee Cerka. After over 10 years in the personal finance industry and multiple personal financial and medical crisis, I was fed up with the lies or two being shouted from the rooftops by the Guru’s and the media. So now I help you the ambitious woman step into unstoppable finances.
When you step into unstoppable finances, you create financial abundance that aligns with your personal values and goals. Without working 80 hours plus work weeks, without pinching pennies, without worrying how you’ll handle the next curveball. life throws your way. And a simple to the point kind of way. Being married, having four kids at home homeschooling, being a CEO running the household, I’m kind of busy. And I know that you are too.
So here, we get straight to the point. If you’re ready to eliminate fear, stress, struggle, frustration and guilt from your finances, and all the areas they affect. You’re in the right place. Welcome. I’m so glad you’re here!
Hey, Valerie, welcome to the Your Money, Your life Podcast. I’m so glad to be here. I’m so glad for you to be here. And looking forward to our conversation today.
Oh, thank you. Thank you, I am so excited to be here, we’re going to have a frank conversation
As we will. So, what was one of your earliest memories growing up around money?
Early Money Memories and Their Influence
You know, I remember, I’m studying like five or six. And my parents used to send me to summer camps for an entire month in July. And I remember that, and I don’t know how much money that was, but maybe the equivalent of you know, maybe $10 right now. And I would have money in summer camp to, that was supposed to last for a month. But for some reason, I remember feeling I never had enough.
So, I would kind of like always save the money not buying candies, you know, not buying anything. But I needed to save the money so I could actually buy presents for my parents and my grandparents on the way home. Yeah, so it’s kind of interesting when I think about it, because I’m like, I will like through the entire month, I would be saving it. And then when it was time to buy presents, I’m like, I don’t have enough I’m gonna kind of see all month long. I didn’t use any of it and everything. And I always felt like it was lacking.
Exploring Money Mindset Through Memories
That’s so we find that that’s so common and so much of like our mindset and those beliefs that we formed when we were young. And one of the reasons that I just started getting to ask this question like you’re on the podcast is I love hearing. A lot of times it’s almost like that Aha, you can hear in the background and the voice like, oh, wow, like that was something that I thought even then.
And it just kind of shows how we’ve created these beliefs that we didn’t even realize it. So, thank you for sharing that with us. I really appreciate it. Now, what was the favorite childhood memory around money, make sure that we’re having fun here, something fun to do could be trip present activity, etc., anything like that?
Um I think it was the $20 bill, as well as the lottery ticket that my grandparents, especially my grandmother was putting together as a Christmas present.
Oh, that’s so fun. Did you ever win anything on your lottery ticket?
You know, I don’t think I ever check them. Funny. But it was so funny because I don’t remember getting presents from them like toys only, he like this. But every year, that was the bill in the lottery ticket. Wow. And so that kind of became the expectation. And I think, even though there was not a tangible thing, it was not something as saved. The memory of it is great. And so, it was more the fact that was coming from them. Yeah, you know.
And we talk pretty frequently, actually about, it’s not necessarily about the stuff and creating those memories. So, I love that they were able to do that for you.
Yeah, that was cute.
Now, you are a life coach specializing in stress management coaching. Why don’t you tell us a little bit about how you’ve arrived here in this place and specializing in stress management?
Yeah, definitely, I’ll be happy to do that. So, you know, I’m originally from France, and I came to the US to spend a year here learn English and have a little bit of fun time for a year or two. And then come back and go back to France. Well, that didn’t work out this way. Because I wanted to keep, you know, learning and getting through education here.
So, lifestyle is going on in the west, with education. And then my career started, and I was having a great time, I was having quick friends, you know, great hobbies, like, I’m a sailboat racer. So, I was just having fun in life.
And then if you move forward a few years, fast forward a few years, I started losing interest. And what I didn’t realize is that as time was going by, I was kind of getting bored. And I was losing interest, I was losing. I didn’t want to see my friends anymore, I was getting tired, I couldn’t sleep well. And I became kind of like, a little bit angry at everything.
Like, even in my job, I was kind of bored. And it was getting to the point where I felt very stuck, but I couldn’t move. And then comes along the that boss. After a few months, I was having nervous breakdowns with him, just the relationship was not good.
And like I was just feeling he was just yelling at me and things like this. And then after a couple of few breaks down, I just; I just quit. I just couldn’t do it anymore, and everything.
So, after quitting, coaching actually kind of, you know, started learning about myself and just feeling better. And after a couple of months, you know, my partner said, you know, I know you were unhappy, I just didn’t know how much you were unhappy.
The Connection Between Financial Stress and Mental Health
And so, what I realized through that coaching is that I was so stressed by everything by life in general, that I got myself stuck, and I couldn’t go anywhere. I couldn’t do anything. So, after doing the coaching, I just got a double certification life and health coaching. And I decided to really specialize in stress managing management, because I don’t want anybody else to be going through that when you actually have the power to prevent it.
So that there’s a lot of things that you go through life, and then it’s like small accumulation. And if I had known finally manage my stress, then I could have avoided having to go through those numbers, and quit my job. So, this is why I’m here today.
I love that I always love hearing so often, we have these struggles, these tribulations that we go through. And when we get to the other side, we have typically it’s a coach, which is the fourth part of the unstoppable finances framework.
Guys, you hearing this, how it plays in everywhere, that you have somebody that has guided you through and it’s only because you went through there, that you’re able to fulfill your passion now. So, listeners if you’re in the thick of it just know like there’s resources with the coaching to help you. And oftentimes, our biggest trials become such big passion motivators for us moving forward. So, it might not seem like a blessing in the moment, but it’s probably in there. So, thank you for sharing that with us.
Yeah, definitely.
Where do we see stress affect other areas of our life? Like finances for example.
Financial Stress: A Hidden Influence on Money Management
So yeah, so the stress is if you think about it, it’s gonna be affecting all areas of your life. You know, not just the health but also if you think about your home environment, you’re gonna have like, you know, when you’re stressed you’re tired you’d like motivation.
So, for example, you just like not gonna clean the home because you just don’t want to do it. You don’t have the you don’t have the energy to do it. So, and it kind of becomes a vicious, vicious circle when like, okay, you don’t clean your home. And because and then you start watching TV and then you end up with like, when you come home after work, you look at the houses. And that’s it. Resting.
Alright, so there’s that vicious circle. And that’s the same thing between, like with your workout with nutrition. So, and your relationship, the same thing.
So, the relationships, you also have the situation where you’re getting more angry, you’re not motivated to do anything to see people, or like you really short with people, if they say something or do something that you’re not, you know, agreeing with. So, your mind is kind of very clutter, and then you make the wrong decisions.
That’s the same thing with finances. So is your financial situation creating stress or stress creating your financial situation. And that’s the same thing for your home environment, your workout and everything like that. So, for example, when you are stressed, you have no motivation. So, you’re not going to take action, you’re not going to pay attention to your finances.
So, if there’s a statement that shows up and there’s something wrong on it, you know, you’re gonna look at it, or like, Oh, I know how my tax deadlines coming up from like, I don’t want to do it, you know, things like that. And then you let it go. Right? And you miss the deadline said, so ends up costing you money, you will think that you feel better if you buy something, and then you’re going to be overspending, right so now that’s the stress creating that financial situation.
But if you think about the other way, the economy the way that the economy is, like all the worries about the finances, your future situation with finances. So the economy is not good, people are gonna are getting laid off, am I gonna get laid off? What’s gonna happen to my time when if the market punches?
Whether you’re close to your timeline, or not even close, you could be far away from it, you could be 2030 years away from your retirement, but you still thinking about it? Because you’re investing the money in your retirement and you’re like, why should I even do it if the market crashes, and I’d have no money after 30 years of selling, right? So that’s where the vicious circle the distress, stress is affecting the finance and the finance affecting your stress, right? Definitely. Yeah.
Free Resource: Money Mindset Mastery Checklist
If you’re loving today’s episode, then this free resource might be for you. I’ve taken those common money, mindset struggles, myself and my clients of experience, and the shift you need to break through and I put it together in 10 simple steps. It’s called the Money Mindset Mastery Checklist. And together, we’ll uncover the roadblocks that are holding you back from achieving your financial goals.
Have you ever wondered how to improve your relationship with money, but struggle with finding a simple way to start? Well struggled longer, if you’re ready to take charge of your financial success, then grab this free 10 simple step checklist to create an unshakable money mindset. To check out the Money Mindset Mastery Checklist and step into that unstoppable money mindset. Simply visit https://aimeecerka.com/mindset or text mindset to 817-969-4653. And of course, if you missed that link, or you’re driving, it’s hanging out the show notes for you.
Misconceptions About Stress and Finance
Now, what is one idea that you think majority of people get wrong, a myth you would say that you’d want to like, that’s just totally not true and help us see the light.
People think that they because they have no symptom, they got no stress. So, making sense? Yep. Actually, the symptoms are there, we just don’t recognize them. why? It’s because they’re just regular symptoms.
There can be the same symptoms and then catching a cold, you’re tired, you have no energy. You’re like, you know, for women, she might have her current menstrual cycle being, you know, all screwed up, you know, things like this. So, they they’re like not recognizing those symptoms as symptoms of stress.
And like I said before, too often it takes and it gets to be like at the time when there’s like a serious change in your life in order to recognize that, that you were stuck and you were actually stressed. Right? It’s kind of creeping up like so that the chronic of the stress that keeps adding up and then you get a big blow up.
So, it does exist. Everybody has it.
The Connection Between Financial Stress and Mental Health
Everybody handles it a different way; some people can handle more than the other. So, for example, when you work, some people will have a very stressful job. And they love it, because that’s one, they thrive with it, but some older people won’t.
And so, what you have to realize is that you need to be able to prevent the creeping up of it. And it’s, I don’t want to see as easy as, but it’s about creating a routine to minimize it.
And the same way that you know, you brush your teeth, it’s become a routine is to prevent bacteria and infections and all that. So, the same thing with the stress, it’s about creating a routine that will prevent it, even though you don’t have or you don’t feel or you don’t see the symptoms now.
Yeah, yes, it does, like a simple routine. It’s not necessarily easy. But it’s simple. I love that.
And I’m betting you’re gonna agree, one of my favorite phrases that I hear so often, when I do these interviews, and one of the things that like I deal with is common doesn’t mean that it’s normal. So, we can have all these common things with it; doesn’t necessarily mean it’s normal.
We’ve kind of expect accepted it as like, this is just the way it is when in reality, that’s not actually the way it has to be. Would you agree with that?
Yes, I do
I know, you had a really powerful story that you wanted to share about money mindset experience that you had recently, why don’t you go ahead and share that with us?
You know, my coach and I were talking about money. And I was telling her that I’m like, I have no problem accepting money against the work I do. And I often felt that in my career earlier, I was locked.
I always felt like, I deserved more. But you know, but then as we started talking, she wanted to do an exercise of visualizing exercise. And so, you know, I close my eyes, and I’m listening to her.
And, and I’m like, she’s asking me to visualize money. I could not. So, she was trying to give me example, like, Okay, can you can you visualize the dollar bill? Or 20? Or $100? Bill? Or could you visualize a, you know, a block of, you know, made of dollar bills, or swimming in the pool for us money with US dollar, or euros or any other kinds of some kind of money but there’s a coin.
If it’s gonna be hard to swim in the pool full of coins, but you know, and really, seriously, I could not visualize anything. And so, what I realized is that, we finish that, and then later on, I’m like, why is that I was really kind of, like, almost mad at myself, like, how is it I get visualized money.
Then, as days went by, within a month after that, I wouldn’t be doing something. And then suddenly, he’s like, oh, I got this memory about money. And it started like, like, being an adult, I have this memory of buying something and feel guilty or have this memory.
And as the time went by, I kind of went younger, younger, younger. So, the story I told you, when we started this podcast, it was about, like, the summer camp, and when I was four, or five. But then there was another time where I remember my mom telling me about a story.
You know, a few months ago about when her and my father were first married, and she went out and spent $2 on the tree. And I can’t really remember the story, I’m gonna have to ask her again, but she was saying something about them getting into a conflict about it.
So, I’m gonna have to now that I have this coaching session, when I coach I’m gonna go back to my mom and say, Okay, did you have a fight about money about that situation? Or did you fight about money or things like this? Because I don’t remember money being a topic of conversation ever in our house. Which could be a money mindset, right?
But then it’s like, Why? Why is it that there was no conversation of that, but now my mom is telling me about a loop fight when they first married. So, was I born? Was she pregnant with me? You know, I’m gonna have to ask her, I’m gonna go back and ask her those questions about it.
So, I thought it was very interesting because I’m like, I have no problems with money. And I’m like, yeah, probably have more problems than think I do.
I did a podcast episode in December; I think is when it aired and it was titled Are you open to receiving money? And I even start off the episode and I’m like, if I’m asking in this question, everyone’s like, Yes, Aimee, I want to receive money, you send me all the money.
Building Resilience: Navigating Financial Challenges
And we talk about how many times we’ve actually created these negative associations, either guilt or shame. And it can be from conversations, we also saw so much of our body language is not what we’re actually saying that the body language, you could have even picked up on that from your parents and brought like associations. And we don’t even realize we’re doing it. It’s all subconscious. So, thank you so much for sharing that.
Yeah. And the other thing I also realized was that, I don’t want to ask for money. I don’t want to be dependent on someone for money, or for my life in general. So, you know, difficult situation, when you start your own business where it’s like, I’m running out of money, and I need to go get some money, I need to get clients and things like it.
So, like, and that’s how it’s because your vibe is showing that everybody seeing that you’re like, no, I’m okay. No, you’re not. Okay, so being able to accept the help of someone else financially is something that one of my mindsets also, you know.
Yeah, we have to work on receiving it. And money shows up because money is the currency. But that value that exchange, I was actually just telling somebody earlier, like, a way that I received money this week is, when I placed our grocery order. They doubled all the produce that they gave us; they charged us for ones that that they doubled, like the thing and it’s delivered to our doorstep. It’s not like I could return it or anything. But that was a value of money that we receive, because it’s that value exchange.
So, it shows up in different ways. If you can start with those small little steps, and even like for our listeners, if you start with those small steps, like we talked about not ignoring the penny on the ground, because that’s still money, that’s still wealth.
And if you can start picking those things up and accepting it like and the little things and being aware, that is like the first step. Because once you’re aware, then you can kind of be like, you’ll catch it more often.
It’s like, oh, I was ignoring that, or I wasn’t wanting to accept that or I shied away from this. I went and did this task instead of going and asking for the money like I needed to, or there’s a million different things that come up. But thank you for sharing that. I love hearing that you’re now aware of this, and you get to go do some research and see what happened when you were younger, and how that kind of transformed everything for you.
Yeah, I mean, I’m lucky enough that she’s still alive. And she’s able to answer those questions for me, you know, and so that’s when people go through this process younger, and they have the ability to ask those questions.
And also from my mom, she might not even realize that this is what happened, you know, but she just happened to mention that story. And now that I’m talking about money, I’m like, Oh, I wonder if I was present during that time? Did I see something? Did I hear something? Or are we feeling the vibes?
Because if there was tension between them, you know, then I as a child, I probably felt that so that was, that’s an interesting, definitely, I’m gonna go down. I will probably report back to you on that.
Practical Steps to Financial Wellness
Yeah, I want to hear definitely report back. I want to hear that. Now. I believe that you’ve got a free gift for our listeners. So why don’t you share some about that and where we can locate that?
Yes. So, I have created a journal going through this process. I kind of like how did I get myself unstuck through the process and all that.
So, I created this journal, a transformation kickstart journal. It’s a 14-day journal. And the goal of the journal is to go through an inventory of where you’re at, in four areas of your life, finance, career, health, and relationships.
Love relationships, I kind of put that together. So, it’s one week is to have that and the next week is the two other ones. So, it’s about starting to make small changes in in those four areas, and seeing where you feel stuck or you feel resistance, or you know, anything like this and what it brings up when you’re trying to do small changes.
Normally, when you do a big change, you’re gonna feel resistance. But if it’s a tiny little change, or you have no idea what you want to change or things like that, those might be signs that you might be stuck in that area and then from there, kind of do some reflection on what how is this distress? What is creating me being stuck in there not being able to transform in that area of my life or is that’s something else that is creating stress and therefore I’m stuck and I can’t move.
So, my Instagram is @coachvalmn. And in my bio there’s a link to that to that channel.
Awesome and is Instagram the best place to connect with you online.
I also have a Facebook group called the Kick Stress To The Curb.
I like it we will make sure the link for both of those is in the show notes below so if you miss that, or if you’re driving go ahead and grab that and that is it for now. We’ll see you next week on the Your Money Your Life podcast
Work With Me
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